Thanks to her successful business, she managed to buy a home large enough for them all – her ex lived in one section of the house. This meant her children saw their father regularly and their lives were not upended.
The family’s living arrangement continued throughout the kids’ primary school years. When they were in secondary school, Carolyn helped her ex set up his own business and eventually, he moved out.
“I’m lucky that my business provided me the means to have this living arrangement. I wanted my children to have access to their father.
“We are better off as friends, but not as husband and wife. Whatever problems we had, were adults’ problem and not the kids’. Their relationship with him should not change because of our divorce.”
SHARING ROOMS WITH THE EX WHILE ON HOLIDAY
Priscilla (not her real name), who is in her late forties, divorced her husband in 2012, when their son was three.
“Looking back, I was focused on our newborn and didn’t give him the attention he needed as his partner,” the general manager said.
Her husband moved out when their son was a few months old then returned a few months later to try and make things work. But things fell apart in a year.
She continued to live with him in the same house although they had separate rooms. By then, she was a solo parent to their one-year-old son.
“He was never around when it mattered. When our son was sick with a high fever, instead of staying around to help, he bailed to go on a date,” she said.
When a huge fight turned physical and she injured her hand, they realised that fighting was futile – and he moved out permanently. “We saw it was important for us both to acknowledge that our relationship was over. That everything we were doing should benefit our son,” she said.
