MY COMPLICATED HIGHER CHINESE JOURNEY
Twenty-four years ago, I did well at the PSLE and was offered the opportunity to study Higher Chinese in secondary school. I grabbed the chance with both hands, motivated by the desire to read my favourite Japanese manga that were more widely available in Chinese translations.
I enjoyed it at first, revelling in the many opportunities for cultural immersion.
I remember going on an exchange programme in Secondary 2 to Yunnan, China – the very first time I’d been in an environment where the dominant mode of communication was Mandarin.
I remember calligraphy classes and competitions.
I remember being introduced to Chinese poetry. I was so taken by the lyrical quality of some verses that I memorised them without being told to.
I even remember being taught snippets of Chinese classics like Romance Of The Three Kingdoms and Dream Of The Red Chamber, and trying valiantly to read the whole texts on my own.
However, the pressure to perform really heated up in Secondary 3. My grades started slipping no matter what I did – private tuition, extra consultations with school teachers, memorising swathes of Chinese vocabulary.
I struggled with my exams. Eventually, I reached rock bottom with a definitive F9 for Higher Mother Tongue at the O-Levels.
Today, I still carry some of the trauma of failing so abjectly. I stutter when I attempt to speak to my children’s Chinese teachers, and I haven’t dared pick up a Chinese book since I left the language behind in junior college.
WHY HIGHER CHINESE, INSTEAD OF JUST CHINESE?
I forgot how beautiful Chinese is until recently, when I started to relearn the language again alongside my children, who often come home from pre-school with worksheets explaining the origins of Chinese words in cartoons or drawings.
Cheng yu are a personal favourite these days – idioms often derived from classical or historical origins. For example, I’d first learnt 饮水思源 (yin shui si yuan) decades ago, but coming across its meaning as an adult – “when you drink water, remember the source” – made me appreciate anew how evocative it truly is.
Exploring these idioms with my children often opens up organic conversations about the values that are important to us and compels us to connect with our cultural identity and heritage.
