All this greatly frustrated me at first. Now, I’m learning to come to terms with my new reality and focus on the positives.
I’m aware that I’m in a much better position than many others, for instance. I count myself lucky that there are varied treatment options that are accessible to me and that I’m able to work in an air-conditioned environment.
My loved ones patiently support me and pick up the slack – my mother and grandfather always pack extra portions of food for me when I visit, and my partner pre-cuts my fruits and veggies so I can have easy access to them.
I’ve also learnt to start celebrating my own efforts, no matter how small the task seems. I’m learning to applaud myself for keeping my spaces clean and for working out even though I could easily call it a day on account of my eczema.
One of the advantages of being stubbornly determined is that it still doesn’t completely stop me from doing what I want.
At the start of this year, I went on my second snowboarding trip.
It was a lot more painful than the first, given that my eczema has intensified over the last few years. Everything was worse: Showers were more unbearable, the dry air seemed to siphon moisture out of my skin even through layers of moisturiser, and I had many teary fits of sheer frustration.
Strangely enough, I still don’t regret it.
I’m sure it won’t be the last snowboarding trip of my life, but for now, it is goodbye.
I can look forward to the many other new experiences awaiting me in future, but in the meantime, I need to focus on taking care of myself.
There’s no shame in listening to my body and letting go of something I want to pursue so I can care for my well-being.
Kora Fong is a digital analyst at CNA Digital.
If you have an experience to share or know someone who wishes to contribute to this series, write to voices [at] mediacorp.com.sg with your full name, address and phone number.
