Ms Chandramogan, a freelance behavioural therapist, had long decided that she would take care of her elder brother, 37-year-old Balamurugan Chandramogan, for the rest of her life.
Seven years ago their diabetic mother had to undergo a below-the-knee amputation that left her wheelchair-bound, and in 2023 their father passed away unexpectedly in his sleep – making Ms Chandramogan the main caregiver in the household.
She once explored placing her brother in an adult disability home, but the long waiting lists and overwhelming “sense of guilt” made her reconsider.
“I’ll ask myself why I’m not able to do enough for him that I have to turn to homes for help,” she told CNA. “And I feel sad knowing he will be there for a long time with strict visiting hours, and I’d worry if he’s being well taken care of.”
Her brother has the cognitive age of a three- to four-year-old, and can perform basic daily functions like showering, eating and wearing clothes. But the likes of handling money, developing a sense of safety and understanding social cues remain a challenge.
“I know his medications, how comfortable he is feeling and even his spice tolerance when he comes to food,” said Ms Chandramogan.
“So it’s a mixture of being the younger sibling, the older sibling and the parent at the same time.”
